OUR AIRING OF GRIEVANCES SUBMISSION HAS CLOSED
Check our the grievances below, or read the article 2022: One-Hundred Festivus Grievances.
Airing of Grievances – Festivus 2022
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[…] the list below, we present one-hundred Festivus grievances, great and small, published on our website during Festivus 2022. In the Seinfeld episode “The Strike,” Frank Costanza lost his […]
My cat slapping me in the face until I wake up.
Putin
Rich people.
Who needs ’em??
My grievance is to those who lie and openly promote cryptocurrency only because they want the value of their own crypto portfolio to rise. It’s a fake economy.
If it comes to the point where we need to make Soylent Green from humans we should start with NASCAR fans.
NFL fair catches. The most boring play in football.
I am aggrieved by the ridiculosity of making permanent tax cuts for the wealthy and expiring tax cuts for who? The Rest Of Us! Violation of the Festivus spirit!
I’m not sure because I was under sedation, but I think the doctors were laughing during my colonoscopy. What was so funny? Did someone tell a knock knock joke?
Republicans supposed to be the party of law and order but they support a treasonous insurrection of an our nation’s house of law and order?
My cat has bad morning breath. I love that little fur ball, just don’t breath on me first thing in the morning.
Christmas demands money and with today’s inflation poor people can’t afford the essentials. Maybe that’s why Festivus is still popular.
I celebrated 5 years clean last month. I have a reliable car. A job that will survive the economy and I found my goddamned personality. Instead of enjoying my life I’m caring for my elderly grandpa wondering what he won’t be able to do next. i understand I volunteered for it and there’s no better option, but 2 months ago it was cooking at watching football, now it’s ducking everything.
Putin.
The Entire Howard family needs to leave Casey’s boyfriend alone. The last time they homewrecked Casey the boyfriend of ten years they stole died on their watch when they didn’t take care of him… And shut him out in the cold. ruined his life for three years actively, sending their crew to come and rub his face in it. …now they’re stealing his boyfriend of five. And it’s working?! Vile creatures, anybody named Howard! Even Howard the duck! Howard you, sir? NOT GOOD! One brother takes over where the other one tires out like a WWE match. Which is a good analogy. Because they lie and flatter and tempt and are so fake their ingredient labels include partially hydrogenated derivative extract of Satans nutsweat and all artificial flavors (not suitable for human consumption, please wear gloves with a twenty three foot pole while discarding them into the trash, “Free stuff!(TM)” comes with each brother, void where prohibited, which is everywhere, unwritten stipulations may apply, please use twenty three foot pole as a defensive tool to protect yourself and those around you from a Howard brother, cousin, uncle, or hypothetically presumable female variety Howard. Only you can prevent Howards. Souls and lives are nonrefundable once swindled by a Howard. If you have been in any kind of Howard like interaction, please call Unsolved Mysteries, because they belong with the rest of late night trash haunting your sound-of-the-television influenced nightmares where you wake up crying, call your boyfriend, and say, “I had a nightmare and it was terrible, and I love you very much. Would you marry me? For the love of God and all the gods? For the sake of Festivus?! For a Festivus miracle?!” Please dispose of a Howard by using a Casey. Casey’s have all natural ingredients, made with love, organic, fun, kind, joyful, steadfast, and tasty. For that deep, earnest, and sweet life, try, Casey!(R). Marriage proposal a serious offer. Howard commentary sarcasm unless otherwise specified. But it is a true story, and what a pair of douchebags, eh?