Festivus 2021 represented the 24th year since the Seinfeld Festivus episode aired on December 18, 1997. Since then, the cacophony of Festivus grievances has risen to the current level, and aided by the despair and disgust the Covid-19 pandemic has brought to the world, there is no shortage of things to complain about.

In the list below, we present one-hundred Festivus grievances, great and small, published on our website during Festivus 2021. Yes, we moderated the submissions, as we had to weed out anything that was libelous, inflammatory, racist, hate speech, or fake news. If you have a problem with this, please send us your complaints. We just love to hear from you.

Last year there were more complaints about politics. This year Covid has stolen the spotlight. No huge surprise there. Here is the list. Maybe you will find your own complaint in the pile, or discover some gripes you didn’t realize you had.

The numbering is not a ranking.

One-Hundred Festivus Grievances

1. My dad eats too much hot sauce and it makes his farts smell like sewage. (DJCDR)
2. People forget that Christmas is on December 24th and 25th. Yet by the end of October/beginning of November, the markets, the media, etc. are already in Christmas mode. It feels like they’re trying to stuff this holiday down our throats. (Anonymous)
3. You pay so much to go to Disney World only for them to upcharge you left and right and mess up your Magical Express transportation back to the airport. Ready for them to figure out people aren’t gonna pay it…happiest place on earth my foot! (Miserable with the Mouse)
4. In McDonald’s Happy Meal…they no longer give you a boy toy or girl toy. It is “gender neutral”… but these “gender neutral” are usually girl toy’s. Never a truck, or something a little boy would play with. Let boys be boys & girls be girls. It is damn ridiculous. (Sally)
5. My nephew’s girlfriend is 6 months pregnant and I just found out yesterday!! A phone works 2 ways, ya know!! (Frankie)
6. Fred drinks wine all night and turns into a stupid jerk! (Ethel)
7. Wen Moon? Wen Lambo? (Anonymous)
8. Why are houses so god damn expensive? (Anonymous)
9. Why isn’t the 23rd of December a paid holiday for those of us who celebrate Festivus?! Big Government and Business are infringing on my right to celebrate new holidays! (J Peterman)
10. 1-877 Kars4Kids… K.A.R.S Kars 4 Kids…. Aaaaaaaaa make it stop! (Bizzarro Jerry)
11. They know how to take the reservations but they don’t know how to hold the reservation. That’s really the most important part of the reservation: the holding. Anybody can just take them. (Jerry)
12. My favourite show moved from a major network to a streaming service, and now I have to pay more to watch it. (Michael)
13. SPAM CALLS, especially Car Warranty Renewals! (Art Vandelay)
14. People who don’t put their shopping cart back in the cart place… they just push it off to the side and drive away. (Shopper)
15. There is a shortage of Christmas trees but there is no shortage of aluminum poles. Know what I’m saying? (Anonymous)

Really Grinds My Gears

16. My neighbor leaves her dogs out over night when she goes out of town. Whoever takes care of them puts food outside for them. You guessed it, they are visited by opossums and raccoons, and bark their fool heads off. Now we are all awake. I know this is California, but it still gets cold at night. Don’t neglect your dog! Take it for a walk sometimes! Provide shelter when you go out of town! You really should not own a dog at all. (Not Nancy)
17. It was already bad enough that YouTube had ads at the beginning, in the middle, and at the end of the videos. But now, it seems like the videos are longer. For instance, there’ll be two videos and one of the videos will be 15 seconds long and other times, there’ll be three videos. Plus, there’s no skip ad option. Why can’t we go back to the days where YouTube didn’t have any ads in their videos? (Anonymous)
18. Dolts who buy a single cup of coffee, open up their laptops and then proceed to spend three hours monopolizing a table at a coffee shop while others have to stand and eat/drink their order. Seniors who refuse to collapse their walkers (read the frigging bus rules posted) so everyone has to climb over their apparatus to board. Pigs who leave all their trash (upturned popcorn, etc.) at the movies when the huge garbage bins are on their way out. Ugh! (Susan in NYC)
19. WHY DID YOU PEOPLE DISCONTINUE MY FAVORITE HOME MADE PIZZA???? (Bertus)
20. Neighbors that think they can tell you how to maintain your property and don’t even take care of their own (Anonymous)
21. My boyfriend is pretty much a roommate. I have to ask him to do everything or he won’t. We have girls. I hate that they will see this behavior as normal for men to do. (Anonymous)
22. My dog is so whiny. The sound grates on my ears. (Anonymous)
23. I refuse to frequent stores that happily take my bottle deposit, but stupid bottle/can robot machine will not accept the returned can because they “can’t read the bar code”. You took my money, now I want it back! (Jimmy doesn’t like that!)
24. Why am I the chauffeur, chef, maid, laundress, dish washer, personal shopper, errand girl, and chief flunky at this house? You left the door open and the cat got out, what were you thinking? I like Green Beans even if you don’t and I’m gonna cook them more often. How do you get cooking oil on your shirt sleeve shoulders at work? Who does that? (Schizoozy)
25. I hate that all the TV Studios are setting up pay channels. Life was way better when TV was free. My Festivus pole is a cardboard center from the roll of paper towels covered with aluminum foil, shiny side in. (Schizoozy)
26. Why does it take 2 hours to update my computer and when it’s done it is the same as it was before the update? (Sweet Stu)
27. People who leave doggy poop bags by the side of the road. Put them in the garbage! If you can’t take care of your dog’s poop, you shouldn’t have a dog. (DN)
28. Every time I hear a commercial on the radio or TV for “Ibrance” I have to mute it. Otherwise it’s “side effects include nausea, vommitting, diarrhea, death etc….” It’s really annoying! (Ana)
29. Why do I pay for libraries in my council taxes? I don’t want to borrow a book ever! (Anonymous)

Driving Dissatisfaction

30. People who try to wave you through the four way stop when it’s their turn. I don’t need a favor people, just follow the rule or we’ll all crash into each other! (Sara)
31. Why is gas so expensive and why don’t we ever realize how the oil companies have been gouging us for years with their price fixing and monopolies. (M. Newman)
32. People who drive like idiots, putting everyone on the road at risk. What part of Covid is responsible for that? (Jonathan)
33. Aggressive drivers weaving through traffic. Where are you going and what are you trying to accomplish? We get to a red light and there we are, all together, so… (Driver)
34. GET OUT OF THE LEFT LANE. ALSO, THE RULES OF DRIVING APPLY WITH CARTS AT COSTCO. IN GENERAL, PULL YOUR HEADS OUT YOUR AZZES. (GO AWAY)
35. Headlights these days are TOO BRIGHT (Anonymous)
36. People who drive with their high beams on around other cars. They blind you from the front, they blind you from behind…. Get a grip! (Bizzarro Jerry)
37. People who don’t know how to use a round-a-about and treat it like a 4-way stop or worse who stop in the damn middle!! Just Go ahead (Mike)
38. People that drive like they have never saw snow before and drive like it’s the first time they have witnessed a winter. This is Canada people it happens every year and It’s okay to drive more than 10KM Per Hour. Yes it may be scary at first but you will get used to it the more you do it. Not to mention you likely won’t crash and die you may even keep the people in the 30 vehicles behind you in the Christmas Spirit. (Darcy)
39. Yes! And those who have the right of way, while making a left and wave you on to turn first! No thanks. I don’t want to get creamed by the car zipping around you in the shoulder. (Anonymous)
40. I got a lot of problems with you people and now you’re gonna hear about it. There’s only one southbound lane going to that traffic light. Everybody’s left turn signal is on and we’re waiting for a green light. You can’t round people off on the shoulder to make a left. Serenity now! SERENITY NOW! (not Frank Costanza)
41. People who drive Audis, Mercedes, Land Rovers act like they are the most important people on the road. Is it because they market these vehicles this way, or is the stick shift up their butts? (Anonymous)

Sports Squawks

42. Sports leagues that have to cancel games because of Covid. Players are sick? Put them on the injured list and play the games. (Anonymous)
43. Buffalo Bills, just once I want to see you win the Super Bowl before I die. When are you going to get rid of Brian Daboll? Brandon Beane’s “process” is also hurting us. You cannot stop this comment the way you stop the run. (Gamblor)

Covid Complaints

44. Omnichron enough said (Ronald E Crowley)
45. Antivaxxers and another strain of COVID (Anonymous)
46. People who think health restrictions brought forward by doctors and health care professionals are stupid because they cannot wrap their puny minds around it. (Anonymous)
47. People coming in town for the holidays to stay at your house during a pandemic 🙁 (Jennifer)
48. I hope whoever keeps handing out all these COVID variants is forced to eat nothing but bats for the rest of their lives when this is all over. (Andy)
49. I am filled with anger hotter than a thousand suns that I have to expand my covid bubble this holiday season when I don’t want to, just because other people are weak. (Hugh G. Rection)
50. I have a bone to pick with you, World Health Organization! Why did you skip over Nu and Xi and name the latest variant Omicron? What are Nu and Xi, chopped liver? (Linda Underwood)
51. Get your shot or booster, already!! YouTube is not a valid and accredited University. So no…. You did not do “research”. To think you’re smarter than Fauci is outrageous, egregious, preposterous!! (Jackie Chiles)
52. I’m so freaking tired of sick people not staying home! Please stay inside your house- we don’t want your germs!!! (Jennifer)
53. Returning to the office is a thing. (Anonymous)
54. I’m so sick of wearing these face masks! Will there ever come a time where they won’t be required anymore? (Anonymous)
55. I was supposed to do an exam in Handling Cash tomorrow but because of the Omicron variant, my Christmas vacation began a little earlier. I’m just worried about how far this Omicron variant is going to go. I’m supposed to go back on January 10th. Emphasis on supposed to. (Anonymous)
56. My favorite festival after “Old Year’s Night” on JVD, BVI. And, I have 2021 grievances w.r.t. the “willful ignorance” of the unvaccinated. Every death of the unvaccinated does improve the gene-pool. People!!! .. get vaccinated and boosted! We want to get back to normal. (Ski-Bun, Athenai)
57. When people get common sense and start being decent people again and get vaccinated instead of thinking masks violate their right to breath. (Anonymous)
58. Dickheads that won’t get vaccinated. They are generally flat earthers or vegans. The tinfoil hat gives them away (David)
59. People who say (I’m not putting anything in my body) when asked if they got the covid shot. It’s to protect you and others. It’s not a political thing! (Cindy)
60. Covid couldn’t smooth a silk sheet if it had a hot date with a babe… (Anonymous)
61. Isn’t Covid the Grinch that stole Christmas? Screw Covid. Happy Festivus. (Anonymous)

Political Protestation

62. Rand Paul’s annual airing of grievances is the comedy routine nobody ever asked for. Meanwhile, real people have real grievances against his antiquated attitude and the ridiculous policies he supports. (Anonymous)
63. Donald Trump is a bombastic fool and should crawl under a rock forever. (Geoff Evans)
64. People who don’t think January 6th was an insurrection. (Democracy is the Answer)
65. Fox, Newsmax and Oan for making half the country brain dead. (Mantis Tobbogin)
66. The Movement for a People’s Party in the United States needs to grow so that it can be taken more seriously (Anonymous)
67. Conspiracy theorists are rampant. Find out who is profiting from conspiracy movements and shut em down. (Freddy)
68. I’m mad with the people of my country who doesn’t recognizes Gestuvus as a official Holiday. (Marine Biologist)
69. At the risk of being political, you idiots know both parties don’t care about you right? (Robert)

I’ve got a lot of problems with you people!

70. Antivaxxers. Fox News Republicans support antivaxxing and don’t believe January 6 happened. Covid. My cat for peeing outside the litter box. People who make my job harder because they are lazy People who don’t respond to work emails. Anyone who can’t give a compliment to someone who deserves one (Anonymous)
71. All the people who believe in conspiracies, not only USA, but all around the world, rather than accepting reality. (Dadgar Hooshi)
72. Covid…. Politicians… People on the far left and people on the far right. FYI you both suck. There is something called common sense somewhere in-between those polarized groups. I don’t need your opinions or supposed facts. I’m intelligent, as are most Americans, so stop forcing your bullshit on us. (Anonymous)
73. People who don’t do their job and take the credit when others do it for them. Then when you call them out they talk in circles or cry. Worst part is…the person is supposed to be YOUR direct supervisor. (Not doin’ yo job no mo)
74. Texas what the hell? Why are we digressing and not progressing!? 1. Women’s health is the women’s decision period – if you won’t allow masks to protect life then why the hell are you not allowing legal safe abortions – especially when there is rape or incest involved? 2. WTF is it with you all and BOOKS y’all think are making people flip to LGBTQ?? Have you even READ these books? Get a grip – grow up! 3. Voting rights? OMG y’all don’t want immigrants so you come up with stupid laws – and now immigrants actually follow rules become citizens and want to vote and y’all just can’t handle it?? Gerrymander Texas districts so your stupid racist “leaders” can continue to make Texas regress?? If you are from Texas – VOTE VOTE VOTE. Vote these fools out. (Anonymous)
75. There’s not enough noise in the city. Jack hammers. Pile drivers. Sirens. But the one that drives me up a wall are the hot shots who peel out with a deafening roar from their car mufflers. I ask you, “Have you ever seen a cop pull over someone for an obviously-way-too-off-the-charts loud car?” The answer is, “no, never in my life.” “Never in any city.” No matter what city you’re in. It’s more than obnoxious. It’s wrong. I hate it. Dogs hate it. Children hate it. But who are we to consider? I live here and pay taxes. Do you think for one minute someone could consider my feelings important? The answer is, “no, never!” I am just here to pay taxes, so people can make as much noise as they damn well want, why? Because it’s a free country. And if it’s a free country, it’s a free city! Free for sleaze bags to make as much noise as they possibly can. Do they care if you’re deaf as a post by the time you’re 20? “No, never.” Can I get any sympathy here? Go on and say it. Shout it out! “No, never!!!” Til the end of time. (Lise Beane)
76. I’m sick and tired of old people that constantly go to the post office. I need to go no more than once or twice a year but it is always a long line of old people out the door. What are you doing? Why!?? Why do you go to the post office so much? Stop it!!! (Nate – Tennessee)
77. I am sick and tired of people in general! Why r u so mean and grinchy all year long? Life isn’t that hard! (Anonymous)
78. Humanity… Failing me and each other as usual. I dreamed we can be something more but we let agendas divide us. We don’t just try and understand each others side. And im guilt of it is well. I fucking suck along with you. But i still hope we can do better. Let it be a Festivus Miracle. Good luck guys (Anonymous)
79. I’m tired of peeps who r tired of everything (SwineFlew)
80. People and how selfish they are. (Anonymous)
81. People who are a-holes. You know you who you are. (Nobagel)

Serious Stuff

82. My granny passed away, my ipad and my glasses broke and covid still exists (Gobills)
83. where to start?! my mom died a year ago when the police decided they didn’t want to look for her, i got covid from a inconsiderate customer, my doctors refused to put me on my right meds and instead experiment with other medicine that almost cost me a trip to the hospital, i don’t make enough to pay rent, my fiancé lives on the other side of america, and my rights are constantly being taken from me by a government that doesn’t care! (Chrys M.)
84. I’m tired of the very toxic “””friends and family members””””” who think they can take the little I have to offer. SERENITY NOW!! (Estelle)
85. I hate that people tell me they care about how I feel and then act the exact opposite way. Stop lying to my face. (Anonymous)
86. Ex wives who poison children against their fathers… it’s petty, they’re going to realize what a bitch their mom was, and spend years of their lives in therapy. Also, bitter women who refuse to accept that other people are capable of adding love to their children’s lives, they’re the worst (LoLosAHoeHoe)
87. Why did you have one baby with a deadbeat, sis? And then a second?! Now, everytime I call my parents, they are impossible to hear over their near feral grandchildren, screaming in the background, that they babysit for free. Hell, at cost to them! The antivax, drunk, deadbeat that you love so much has ruined everything. (Anonymous)
88. People who don’t treat their animals better. Stop being assholes. (Amy)
89. People who don’t respond to texts or emails. Did you get it? Are you saying meh to what I had to tell you? What is it? (Tully)
90. My wife is dumb and she has a huge ego. She is a very angry person. Living with her is like walking on eggshells. My other has obsessive compulsive disorder and she is manipulative. I try to keep both of them separate. (Anonymous)
91. Little siblings keep going “Did not ask” which is infuriating. Also, my sister (somehow) lost her friend’s Netflix password so I can’t watch Seinfeld on there (Melva)
92. People who believe their freedoms allow them to walk around with a loaded gun. Who are you afraid of snowflake? (Johnny True)
93. I live in Quebec and quite frankly, I’m ashamed of it. What fun is it to live somewhere where your values aren’t represented by any of the major parties? Plus, it feels like they’re trying to force the French language down our throats in Quebec. I’m bilingual (English and French) but with these measures, which I’m going to keep anonymous, like my name, this province seems to be proud of its racism. (Anonymous)

In-Conclusion

94. My place is a sty. (Pig)
95. The last thing I want to think about before and after the holidays is homework. (catto)
96. 2021 wasn’t any better than 2020, just different. How will 2022 top those two years? (Anonymous)
97. I am mad, sad and disappointed that Jerry Stiller is not with us still. (Elwood)
98. My grievance is with 2021 entirely. It is an asshole year. (Entire countries)
99. What really grinds my gears in 2021 is being constipated. (BMOC)
100. I hate snow and Christmas bah humbug (Pat madix)
101. Happy Festivus! Let the airing of grievances begin. (Ron Fetch)

Yes, we know, we have slightly more than 100 grievances on this page. It was another tough year!

If you wish to respond, or have a grievance of your own, please use the comment form below.

Hope you had a Happy Festivus!